BIG FAT FLOPPY TEARS ALERT!!!! I read this dry-eyed right to the end (waiiiiit for it…), knowing for sure… I was bound to cry, right? Why wasn’t I crying yet? WHOA THAT PART? WHOA. THAT THOUGHT? WHOA. WHAT HE/SHE JUST SAID?!!!!! WHOA. THAT FEELING?!! But it’s as if my emotions were on standby. Like I was scared. Like I was waiting… for something, and I didn’t know if I needed to cry for heartache and pain, or for joy. Or for both.
A twinge of unease tainted my happiness, like a drop of black ink in a clear bowl.
BUT OH I felt it. I sighed, I awwwwwwwed and I despaired. I cheered. I feared. But no matter what? I LOVED MY HEART OUT. Still… my despair (or elation) was… reticent. I didn’t know where this was going. It was self-preservation at its finest, but once I reached the pinnacle, I let GO.
R. Renee: Full Tilt by Emma Scott. I’m totally and utterly wrecked right now. I think she may have outdone herself this time. I just posted my review on GR. I’m tough on her because of my love for RUSH. I’ve given a couple of her books 4 stars when they’ve stayed with me enough to make me think they should have been 5. But this one…wow. OMG Maryse. LOVED. Ooh and Maryse, it needs to go on your “what to read after Me Before You” list. I can’t wait until it comes out. I want the paperback. The cover is so pretty and PERFECT for the book. Oh and I don’t think I’ve ever read a blurb that fit its book so perfectly. Especially that last part!
Maryse: I just finished a review copy of this one, and my heart is overflowing with love. And my eyes, overflowing with tears. Flooded. I. LOVED. IT. My review to come in a bit, but I needed to tell you now, to relieve some of this pressure. Emma Scott does it, yet again. This BOOK is a universe.
Sarah: Absolutely beautiful. I loved this book so much that there aren’t enough stars to give to it.
R. Renee: Yay! I just saw on FB, Maryse finished Full Tilt and loved it I love it when something I love is loved!! Whew! That was a mouthful!
This story. Emma Scott. The exquisite writing and the stunning emotion. The reality of it all. Love story perfection. Awe. But where were my tears? Once I hit the last word, and closed out my Kindle app, and I stared. And then my eyes flooded. The tears fell, unabashedly. I had an appointment too. I had mascara on!!! Not the waterproof kind either, but finishing a book LIKE THIS?? In the middle of the day is a risky thing when you’ve got stuff to do and people to see. Yikes. But I didn’t care. This beautiful story merited every tear, every heart-wrench and stomach butterfly.
And now I’d recommend for those that want to go in blind (as I did…) stop reading my review here.
I’ll “short story” my review right here and now, by telling you I give this one 5 stars, and loved the heck out of it, and I had NO clue what I was getting into but for what was told to me by early reviewers. What I review below doesn’t give away more than the blurb does, but I admit… I did NOT read the blurb at all so I experienced all of the surprises. I read this ONLY on early recommendations alone. And it was all that.
So what’s it about?
Kacey is on a downward spiral guitarist in an up-and-coming almost mega-famous band. Drinking to the point of oblivion every night, and struggling with being in the constant glare of the spotlight, she’s “saved” one night by her limo driver (Jonah). She’s drunk, sick and debilitated, and he doesn’t feel comfortable just leaving her, and he takes her to his home, and lets her sleep it off on his couch. Famous or not, she’s a mess, and Jonah has a heart of gold. I fell in LOVE.
She looked around blearily, not seeing me in the kitchen behind her, watching her.
I didn’t know it then—I couldn’t have—but in that moment, the rest of my life, or what was left of it, began.
When she wakes up, surprised that he didn’t take advantage of her,
I wasn’t careful. I was never careful.
…they get a nice greasy breakfast together to head off the hangover, and chat. She finally has someone real to talk to. Someone that’s not interested in her for her fame, but just… because. The bond is forged and neither is ready to let go. And that is where the true story begins. The incredible friendship, and the reason he hesitates in letting ANYONE into his life.
He wasn’t just a total stranger; he was a total stranger who had a serious medical condition. It felt really intrusive to know all this so soon. I was getting a crash course on his extremely personal shit, and he knew next to nothing about me.
Because he just might be living on borrowed time, and he’s desperate to finish an incredibly important project (so focused) that his life is turned upside down when he can’t seem to push her away (for her own protection, as well as his own).
Dying, I learned, is a not a team sport. It’s a solitary endeavor. Everyone I loved was standing on dry land, while I was alone on a boat as it slowly pulled away from the shore, and there’s nothing nyone can do about it but watch it happen.
And what a friendship it is. What an incredible love story. What an incredible growth for ALL involved (even the INCREDIBLE and realistic side-characters), and this is one that I will NEVER EVER forget. The family, the friends…
The Fletchers’ table was full of laughter, nonstop talking and bickering. A bit of silent tension lingered between Theo and Henry, but Beverly defused it with stories of her sons’ youth that had me choking on my bread.
…the heartbreakers, and the deserters.
“I hate that people leave when they’re supposed to stay.”
While it wasn’t necessarily unputtdownable (in that crazy-twisty edgy angsty way), every single word, emotion, thought, and conversation was almost flawless. I was growing with these characters. This story was not about the addictive shock-value or thrill. But it was about an incredible, beautiful journey and “Full Tilt” is the perfect title!
I held it up, letting the sun shine through the empty interior. Not empty, I thought. It holds Jonah’s breath.
God it was awesome…
My only hiccups? The intro was magnificent (and addictive right from the start!), but when the story “actually” started, I was a bit confused at first. I wasn’t sure if we were going back in time, forward in time, and if it had anything to do with the character in the intro. Dual POV’s can be confusing like that at first. But I quickly figured it out and was able to go between both. And while I usually prefer single POV (and especially that from the heroine), I could appreciate the dual POV in this instance.
Also… there were TWO instances that gave me a certain impression. Things that I thought were a sure thing and just cleverly placed (maybe even initiating a certain comfort & security in my reading experience), but that ended up… not quite being what I was already “making up” on my own. Mind you, it doesn’t take away from the story at all (this one as it is… is perfect) but I can admit I was surprised these “things” weren’t taken advantage of, or written into the story at a more detailed level.
No matter. It was fantastic all the way through, and that ending, that emotional fruition, had me, heart and soul.
Somehow, some way, his lights will stay on and I’ll never be lost in the dark.
P.S. Thank you to the author for sending me a review copy!
And here it is on Amazon UK