Undead and Unwed
Hey, everyone! Welcome back. I see some of us brought shifters again. If they are not housebroken they have to stay outside, seriously. One of them peed on the rug, and another attempted to eat something from the trash and got sick in the tub. Come on guys, I already had to glue her fave lamp back together with Gorilla Glue, then get Oops to clean up all the glue that dripped off, and now I’m looking for dye for the carpet, because, did you know Oops takes the color out of fabric? I didn’t know this. Plus MadHatter put SOMETHING in the toilet. I have no idea what and I am scared to ask what it was, but I tell you finding the blankets in the closet to absorb up the mess was nightmare. They were in plastic bags and everything. I still haven’t found the missing chewing gum yet.
We all need to agree to be a little more careful while we are here. I’m sure she won’t mind ya’ll being here, but let’s try to keep it clean, please?
So as I told you last week we were going to talk about the Queen today. Mary Janice Davidson writes a hysterical series starting with Undead and Unwed.
“The day I died started out bad and got worse in a hurry.”
This is the first line of the book and I was hooked. Elizabeth “Betsy” Taylor is a young woman who tried to be a model but was bored with it, and then turned professional temp. She ended up being a secretary but got fired from that on the day she died. Thus begins the hilarity that is Betsy. How would you react if you woke up in a funeral home, in a casket wearing cheap shoes? Yep she freaked out. Then refused to admit she might be dead. Dead people don’t walk around and lisp. OK maybe they do. The most amazing part of this book for me was everyone’s acceptance of her being a vampire. Her mom just shrugs and makes her dinner, and her best friend helps her steal her shoes back from the evil step mother.
I have to say though when Betsy is being “Welcomed” into the local vampire scene her mouth was priceless. All of her snarky reactions were wonderful including when she met the most powerful vampire in the city. His name is Norstro and she calls him “Nostril” displaying no fear of the situation at hand as she strides into the cemetery and mocks Norstro and pretty much tells him he can keep his creepy loser club. Upon her exit from the weirdness of the Undead she runs into a wonderfully hot man-vamp. Sinclair (all who like hot men please *sigh* here) who gives her a panty melting kiss. She then throws him through a headstone and runs away.
Turns out Sinclair and his maker Tina are out to help her overthrow the tyrant Nostro and help her claim her rebirth right of Queen. Wait, Queen of the Vampires? No, thanks. Betsy wants no part of this but ends up roped into it, and you have to see what they bribe her with….LOL is all I can say.
*crosses legs and sits Indian style on the coffee table* Sinclair! Oh he is swoon worthy and Betsy’s new friend Marc (guy who she saved from jumping to his death and then made a small snack out of who then moved in with her) likes him too. Jess (Betsy’s BFF) loves him and even her Mother thinks he is off the chain. The only one who seems to dislike him is Betsy but even she can’t help but notice how wonderful he is. I have to say the part where he makes a deal with her that one day she will need his help and he will give it, provided she puts something of his in her mouth was totally hot even if it was blackmail. Wait till you see what she puts in her mouth! Oh Cheese and Crackers it was great. Let’s just say I had an over the top reaction to it! *wink, wink*
Wait, was that another crash? Please, please, please tell me the person with the monkey didn’t let him in the wine cellar! Oh I am so going to be dead again! Awww man, look at this place! I am going to have to hire professional cleaners for this mess! I already spent all my spending money on “Choco-Blood” a new mix of Chocolate and Blood (Genius right?!) how am I ever going to get this mess cleaned up? Aww man, I don’t know if Grand-maker is coming by today *looks nervous* but maybe I can keep her outside this time. Next time I will tell you more about our fair Queen Betsy in the next installment of the series called Undead and Unemployed. Bye guys, I need to clean up.