Okay, I’m taking us on a “dark reading ride” this week. With my recent Captive in the Dark “coming out” party, and my weekend “Slave/Need” reading marathon, I figured I’d go all out. ‘Cause you see, I’ve been carrying around a couple of dirty little reading secrets, and by the response I received for the “Captive” review, I see so many of you have, too. We really kind of like these reads, don’t we?
Captive in the Dark was one of them, but THIS one was my first. I read this back in 2010!! I wasn’t anywhere near the BDSM reading genre, or anything of the sort. I was still in my full vampire reading frenzy when a friend recommended this one. She knew it was a risk (I was still “innocent” you see) but I think, after she saw my complete acceptance of Vishous and his own “kidnapping/BDSM propensity” with a few of those similar Stockholm syndrome themes, she recognized the possibility that I might enjoy this one. Warning me it would stay with me for days, and I’d be in perpetual confusion over my love/hate relationship with it, but because of that, she just had to tell me about it.
Why had he taken me? Did I send out a vibe or was he just obsessed? Was there something about me that screamed Victim?
I’d always tried to give the impression that I wasn’t easy prey. I’d been fooling myself. It had been ridiculously easy for him to take me.
Oh I read it. Oh boy did I ever. Curled up into a little ball in the corner of my couch, my jaw dropped for most of it, my fear of the whole situation, and then… what… was my heart feeling something for… him!??? NO. WAY! How did she (the author) DO THAT!!!!??? And when my friend asked me what I thought?
Maryse: ok. I LOVED it but I wished there was more of a human connection… something I could relate to…I know that sounds weird but they are so intense and yet so weird… That kind of mind process is not for everyone – not 100% relatable. I just wish somehow that HE I dunno…was nicer? But anyway oh and the part where she *spoiler* made me cry a little. It was so intense and the author’s portrayal of that character’s feelings was amazing. I FELT that whole time.
I went to bed last night not knowing how I felt and this morning realized that while I LOVE the book, the story was exciting intense, made me feel… I’m not on the “master” bandwagon and THIS is why the book is not for everyone – not because of the whips… but because of the KIND of relationship that is required to exist this way – MASTER and slave….and we just dont get it. But…. still…
LOVED it!! LOL!!!
But I must admit, the whole thing was just so mind-boggling and I was so new to the “book lifestyle”, and I just didn’t know how to take my enjoyment of this genre. In fact, I have to admit, I still don’t.
There is a standard victim/victimizer protocol, an etiquette if you will. Why are you doing this? is the introductory question, sometimes followed by screaming or crying. I wasn’t screaming or crying. I wanted to conserve my energy for my one possible moment of escape. Eventually he’d do something stupid. He had to.
After the victim’s opening line, the victimizer usually says something so terrifying the victim wishes they’d never opened their mouth. This man, however, seemed to be capitalizing on the terror of uncertainty.
After all, if he spoke to me perhaps there was someone human in there, something I could reason with, some tiny, frail hope I could bargain somehow. A large, cool hand rested softly against my cheek.
There was no violence or threat in the way he touched me. It was my cheek, so it certainly wasn’t an overly sexual touch. Still, it was a threat to me. It said, I have no problems breaching your personal bubble or touching you at any time.
But as my reading experience grew, and my repertoire expanded, this one always held a prominent spot in my mind. I kept mostly quiet about it, but… sometimes I let the secret out. But I really had to know you liked this sort of stuff before mentioning it. *shrug* What? I didn’t know if it was appropriate to just recommend it to everyone, considering, well… you know. ‘Cause it’s not for everyone. Even some of us that love so many of the same books (alpha males, rock stars, tattooed bad boys, all of that), not all of us might be into “this” kind, you know? Well that was my thought process, anyway.
But then recently, my other friend’s mom brought this book up somewhat fondly (trying to remember the title and saying it had something to do with chicken soup) and I giggled and knew we were a bunch of reading adrenaline junkies for sure (and many of us weren’t talking about it). I mean, yeah. I’m guilty of that, for sure. *grin*
Who am I kidding? Why was I trying to keep this intriguing, captivating, disturbing read from people, who just might ummm… “enjoy” it as much as I did. ‘Cause you guys are out there and have been coming out of the woodwork, one by one, over it.
So what’s this one about? I have compiled a few of “private chat” descriptions that I had with a few readers, and this is pretty much how I kept describing it:
Maryse: have you ever read ummm… uhhhh Comfort Food? OMG BEST!! And lemme tell you – that one is on the extreme side. It was my FIRST!!! Can you imagine?
She’s a cop!!! Knows all about Stockholm syndrome and she gets kidnapped and her guy is a full on Master. The whole BDSM thing/training/punishment and she recognizes the Stockholm syndrome symptoms as they are happening. It is FREAKED out and there are 2 (or 3?) amazing twists that I didn’t see coming.
It really messes with your mind, and you’ll find yourself appalled and yet thinking about it for days. I just was wrapped up in that one. I dont know how it compares to others, and the actual lifestyle cause that was my intro to it. I got sucked right in back in the days before I did reviews for anything other than Paranormal… maybe I should review it now.
Yep, she ends up learning a lot (albeit forcefully) in the process, and questioning a whole lot more. And what’s up with the comfort food/chicken soup? All part of the “training” my friends. If you’re up to it, I’ll let you get all of the details on your own. If you let yourself go, you will find yourself surprised, examining so many things, and thinking about it for days, like I did.
and when Michele told us, awhile back, that she had just read it:
Michele: Rachel & all of you girls who like erotica reads, I just read “Guilty Pleasures” by Kitty Thomas. I really enjoyed it! She also wrote “Comfort Food” that Maryse recommended to me a few weeks ago & enjoyed! Let us know if you read it & what you think.
Maryse’s Book Blog: Oh I had no idea you ended up reading Comfort Food!! Hehehe… how about that ending? *blew my mind* I read that book (Comfort Food) over a year ago (maybe 2 years ago) and didn’t even write the review… cause *ahem* I didn’t know where to go with it, and still… I remember EVERY SINGLE thing about it. Burned into my brain. Definitely NOT for everyone. Can you imagine? THAT was my first foray into the genre…
Michele: Yes, I did & really liked it Maryse. It was very different & YES that ending THREW ME!! I wouldn’t know how to write about it either! LOL. I think I liked “Guilty Pleasures” more though. It was different. Do you know the 1st one for me with BDSM was Grey, then your recommendation “The Reluctant Dom”. Our Christian has turned me into a Monster with those books now.. They are my favorite. Tee Hee!
Maryse: But the author is so good, that I bet you felt her ache, didn’t you? You know when… That was amazing how the author made me FEEL like the heroine. In all that “crazy”, logically my head was in one place… and yet… OMG I felt like crying with her. *shakes head*
So you see? Devastatingly eerie and equally addictive, enthralling, and emotionally connecting. I mean, come on. It’s been two years since I’ve read this, and I’m still not over it? Yep. This is one to let out of the “creepy closet”.
In another situation I would have found him attractive. He was muscular, had a firm jaw, great hair, not an ounce of body fat. I imagined this was what Ted Bundy’s victims felt like at some point, that it was utterly impossible he could want to hurt them and be so beautiful at the same time. The unbelievable shock someone so attractive could be a predator.
Right? I mean… imagine? Eeeep!! I don’t wanna!
I remember every little moment. And OMG the twist (actually a few of ‘em) in this left me breathless. Shocked. Appalled…. and so SO intrigued. Oh and yes… desperate for more. This story could, and totally SHOULD be continued. Plus. Isn’t that mysterious, subtly ominous cover just gorgeous?